Spanking AKA "Licks"

Why Parents Spank Their Children?
                                                    

For most of us who grew up in the caribbean, spanking is a natural form of discipline, perhaps our parents were spanked as a child themselves. We've all heard the phrase "spare the rod and spoil the child". Most of us see it as a good form punishment when a child is about to get hurt or finds themselves in a dangerous situation (running across a parking lot or throw something at their siblings). Still, others use spanking as a last resort, when no other discipline methods have worked.

Sometimes spanking happens when a parent simply gets angry, reacts to what a child has just done and spanks in order to send a strong message in the hopes that the child will not engage in that behaviour again.

Problems with Spanking Children

                                                                         

While most of us support this method and claim it works well, the reality is that all it teaches the child is to behave and "be good", not necessarily to understand why they should conduct themselves in a certain way. For example, if a child moves to touch a hot stove and is spanked, the child will most likely learn not to touch the stove anymore. However, what they won't learn is ​why they shouldn't touch a stove. When a child is spanked in that situation, a teaching opportunity is lost and a chance to review kitchen safety. Spanking puts a stop to a behaviour but it doesn't encourage a child to make decisions or wonder why a certain decision isn't a good one.

Spanking also models aggressive behavior. Even though the child is being hit in the context of being disciplined, it is still happening while the grown up is angry, so it demonstrates to a young child that it's OK to hit someone when you are mad. As a parent, you are your child's best role model.

Alternatives to "Licks"

There are many other ways to discipline a child other than spanking them. Time outs and taking away something that is valuable to the child are both really effective in teaching a child the difference between right and wrong.

The key to disciplining a child isn't just to get them to stop doing something (although that is certainly important). Discipline should also be viewed as a learning opportunity, a chance for a child to learn from her mistakes while developing good decision-making skills that she can utilize in the future.