Raising Boys and Girls: Differences in Development

As a parent who is raising both a son and a daughter I can offer a list of differences between the two genders. My son is a ball of energy all the time, while my daughter could spend all afternoon with a book, also, My daughter was an early talker, but my son was too busy playing with his cars and trucks to chat with us or his sister. 

Boys and girls develop differently in a few ways, and researchers are always studying the genes, hormones, and brain chemistry that might explain some of these differences. Of course, an individual child's development may not fit neatly within gender lines, but learning about the general ways in which boys and girls differ as they grow can help prepare parents for early childhood and beyond.

Physical Growth

Between the big growth stages of infancy and adolescence, boys and girls grow in height and weight at about the same slow but steady rate. There aren't notable differences between the sexes until late primary/elementary school – that's when girls start to grow taller faster, although boys catch up and exceed them within a few years.

Motor skills

Boys' gross motor skills (running, jumping, balancing) tend to develop slightly faster, while girls' fine motor skills (holding a pencil, writing) improve first. For this reason, girls may show an interest in art (painting, colouring, crafts) before boys.

Boys are also more physically aggressive and impulsive, as revealed by studies of their brains. The pleasure centre of the brain actually lights up more for boys when they take risks. That's not to say that girls aren't active risk-takers, only that, on average, boys are more so.

Individual variation and experience matter quite a bit. Boys raised in a household where art and music are appreciated may want to learn a musical instrument rather than play football, and girls raised in a physically active environment may love to go rock climbing. On the other hand, some boys raised in a sporty family may prefer drawing or music, while some girls raised in an artistic environment would rather play sports.

Verbal skills 

Researchers say it's possible that sex-related genes or hormones account for the different ways the brains of boys and girls react to human speech.

More boys than girls are late talkers, and boys may use more limited vocabularies. Girls tend to be better at reading nonverbal signs, like tone of voice and expression, which also makes them better communicators earlier, because they can connect feelings and words faster.

Toilet Training

On average, girls are potty trained earlier than boys, though it's unclear whether this is due to physical or social differences. Mothers generally do the training, and it may be easier for a girl to identify with someone of the same gender. Fewer girls wet the bed too.

Fathers should be a little more involved in the training of boys, as it is easier for them to identify with daddy. This might be a bit ackward for men, but could possibly aid in the timely training of the you lad. 

Resources

AAP. 2015a. Gender identity development in children. American Academy of Pediatrics. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/gradeschool/Pages/Gender-Identity-and-Gender-Confusion-In-Children.aspx [Accessed May 2018]

AAP. 2015b. Physical development: What's normal? What's not? American Academy of Pediatrics. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/gradeschool/puberty/pages/Physical-Development-Whats-Normal-Whats-Not.aspx [Accessed May 2018]

Boes A, et al. 2009. Right ventromedial prefrontal cortex: a neuroanatomical correlate of impulse control in boys. Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience 4(1):1-9. http://scan.oxfordjournals.org/content/4/1/1.full [Accessed May 2018]

Junaid KA, et al. 2006. Gender differences in the attainment of motor skills on the Movement Assessment Battery for Children. Physical & Occupational Therapy in Pediatrics 26(1-2):5-11.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16938822 [Accessed May 2018]